Who are your nearest and dearest?

Did we really choose our families before we even got here? What can we do about those that seem to be doing too good a job at annoying us? Nov 23rd

If I had to nominate the top five challenges bringing people to my coaching services, one of the top three would be their relationships with family members. If it didn't start in childhood, then it somehow developed into a challenge in adulthood. Sometimes it's our core family, and others it's the extended or gained family that causes us stress, anxiety and daylight fumalage (don't look it up, I just invented this word... it comes from fuming...)

With this in mind, I was reminded of a little story the other day, which I will paraphrase, and also hope that it sheds some light on your own life and what you want to do differently moving forward. If not in action, then in mindset...

A little boy came to his dad and said that his friend wasn't playing with him anymore, and asked why. The dad didn't have a big Ol' answer to give, but remembered how someone once said that friendships (spoiler, we are replacing 'friendships' with 'family' here) are like trees. A tree has leaves, branches and also roots.

Some friends are like leaves. They are here for a specific season. You have fun with them when the sun is out. They make you laugh and make your days both special and fun. But when the storm comes, they leave, and that's ok, because they were not meant to stay forever...

Some friends are like branches. They are here for a reason. They lift you up and show you something you were missing, but only for a limited period of time. Sometimes, they break off simply because their job has been completed.

Other friends are like roots. They are around all year round; when it's sunny, when it's rainy, and we're lucky, when it's snowy, too! These people hold you tight, they lift you, nourish you and give you energy; they are there, and they see you, too. These people are your true family, because they chose to be.

The leaves and branches people, they are nice to have, but when they disappear, all that is left to say is thank you for the lessons and the memories. The people to always be grateful for, however, are your roots people. They are the ones that are part of your actual foundation.

So now, what do we do with this very nice story?

Think about the family that is driving you insane. How much energy should you really be spending on them?

A lot of the time, we have this notion that it's family, so you have to put up with it, but even putting up with it doesn't mean you have to let them take all your powers away. Smile, say thank you and let it blow in the wind.

My theory is that we are born into the family that can help us the most to reach and fulfil what we came here to do. Sometimes they do that with being the most incredible support system, and other times they help do the exact opposite of what they ever did, give or represent for us, exactly for the purpose of helping us do what we came here to do.

If you keep on forgiving or putting up with stuff, you might realise that you're not barking up the right tree, because most of the time, they are nasty for your advancement in this life... It's not always easy to know what to do with these people, but one way that can help is by figuring out if this is a pattern of theirs or a one-off.

One-off merits forgiveness and new boundaries. A pattern calls for a whole new decision. Not just about boundaries, but also about figuring out what the lessons they brought you are and if you're now ready to accept them.

We can talk about all this more... I know it's a big trigger for so many! But If I can summarise what I'm thinking here, it's this:

As I see it, we choose our family and lessons way before we arrive here on this earth. BUT, now that we're here:
- Some family members should be treated like leaves. They are clearly not going to fall off with the first storm, but we can agree to 'take' from them just the light stuff, the fun and the insignificant, and when they try and pile up more stuff, we can be the ones that flow away with the wind. Boundaries and self-preservation.

- Some family members, like the branches, should receive more respect and be allowed to weigh in a little more, but even they don't get to impact how we feel in a major way. 'OK, it's just aunty Maureen'... She can say what she needs to say, and you can choose to ignore that if it's been driving you nuts all the way to now...

- Some family members are your roots. Suck it up when they annoy you, because they are clearly here to stay and bring more to your proverbial table than you care to admit... Be patient, but leave yourself some wriggle room if you happen to be going through a rough time, and they seem not to get what you're trying to communicate. Still, be kind!

You know what I mean?

If, on the other hand, your family is a blessing, then at least you know that your life lessons are probably coming from a different direction altogether. Right?

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This week in Healing Conversations...

This week in Healing Conversations, I chatted with Sandeep Nath about The Power of Conscious Living (and how to stop living on autopilot)

In today's episode, “The Power of Conscious Living,” Einav Avni is joined by Sandeep Nath, an expert in inner power, mindfulness, and the philosophy of renewalism. Together, they explore the profound difference between living consciously and simply moving through life on autopilot.

Through personal stories and insights rooted in Eastern wisdom and global experience, Sandeep Nath discusses his own journey from corporate life to studying energy with Tibetan monks, and how aligning body, mind, and spirit leads to true fulfilment. The conversation tackles practical ways to reconnect with purpose, realign one's values, and cultivate habits that renew both individual and collective consciousness, whether in everyday life or within the workplace.

More about Sandeep:
Sandeep Nath is the founder of The RENEWALism Movement. An IIT-IIM alumnus, he founded and ran a successful strategy consulting company before heading to the Himalayas in search of the purpose of life and the drivers of our energy.

As a Professional Speaker & Inner Power Coach, he has taken ancient oriental wisdom practices to more than 46 cities across four continents.

An Author of four books, a Business Qigong guide, an award-winning Mindfulness facilitator, a member of various Boards, and a Top 50 Future of Work expert, Sandeep specialises in overcoming complex business challenges by empowering individual habits. His mission in the current decade is to raise human consciousness.

Next Steps:
- Download your copy of the book RENEWAL https://RENEWALism.com
- Plan a highly personalized, transformative trip to India https://RENEWALTourism.com
- Arrive at your purpose statement or connect with Sandeep Nath https://SandeepNath.com/identi...

Social Links:
1) Website: https://SandeepNath.com/
2) LinkedIn: https://SandeepNath.com/linked...
3) Facebook: https://SandeepNath.com/facebo...
4) YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Sande...

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You may also be interested in...

My friend and colleague, Gila - the Cancer Alchemist, is looking for people going through a cancer healing journey to take this online course and offer their feedback. As a thank you, the course cost is much reduced (£15) and believe me, the content is invaluable!

(I am not affiliated with the course, but happy to share as I know how incredible Gila's work is, and this opportunity is truly amazing!)

Here's what Gila has to say about the course:

For the past 30 years, I’ve been guiding people with cancer to transform fear, exhaustion, and hidden victim patterns into emotional strength, inner peace, and renewed healing energy.

Now, for the very first time, I am opening my new Victim-Free Masterclass in a special Beta Test Edition - and I’m inviting a small group of cancer thrivers and survivors to be the very first to experience it.

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💜 Who is this for?
Anyone currently living with - or recently recovered from - cancer, who senses deep inside that healing is not only physical, but also emotional, energetic, and spiritual.
💫 If this speaks to your heart, and you feel ready to clear the emotional blocks that may be holding back your healing, you’re warmly invited to apply.
👉 Click www.gilacanceralchemist.com/vfmb2 to apply as a Beta Tester

And also...

The nice people at Good Morning US published this article about me and the work I do.
Dialling down fears and doubts to unearth a healthy you - mind, body and soul!

https://goodmorningus.com/untangled-healing-empowering-transformation-through-alignment-and-energy-healing/

A message from the Universe

Dottie's Corner

One thing I like is to pause and just stare at people until they get very uncomfortable and start offering me snacks, treats, cuddles or strokes.
You should try one time, if you haven't yet... you really never know what you might be offered... :D

I work extensively with people to help them transform their lives from fears, limitations and compromises, to harmony, alignment and joy, or in other words - helping people find natural healing to mind, body and soul.

To chat about your own situation and how my methods can help, please book a chat using the link: https://calendly.com/einav-4/coaching-discovery-call

einav x