Why is it so difficult to self care?
Einav Avni 
For some it's a day at the spa, for others, it's the simple things we should do and never get round to doing - looking after ourselves and wellbeing
When I was a child, we were repeatedly told that we needed to brush our teeth. I, being a stickler, took this very seriously, so you can imagine my utter shock and surprise, when, hitting teenage years, I discovered the requirement was not just ONE brush a day, but TWO!!!
What!!!!
You see, at the place where I grew up, we left our parents' home at age 14 and went to live in a semi-teenage community (very long story). There, my room bordered that of my first crush and it was by observing his nighttime routine that I discovered people actually brush their teeth both morning and night!
Trust me when I tell you, it took me exactly one day before I started doing the same and never admitted to anyone it was ever any other way!
Many people think 'self-care' means a day at the spa, but for the people struggling, 'self-care' is anything to do with creating time for themselves, to do even the smallest tasks, like, for example, brushing their teeth (twice a day), making a nourishing meal, or switching off the phone before getting into bed at night.
So, what's going on? Why can some people look after themselves and some people struggle?
Here are a few thoughts on why you may be in the struggling group (in no particular order):
1) you're going through a lot of stress and overwhelm, and may not recognise it but are actually in 'energy savings' mode.
2) being a perfectionist and not finding the time to do things perfectly, ending up not doing them at all (or not as well as you'd like)
3) not feeling worthy. I am not important enough to spend the time in doing things for me
4) anxiety, depression or similar mental health challenges may interfere with setting up priorities that promote self-care
What can you do?
Each person will know if they have the capacity for big or small changes, but I always like to say - let's start with a tiny step forward and take it from there.
Here are some suggestions:
1) decide one thing you will do each day, and do it, without fail, for 7 days straight (we are starting to build habits and repetition helps)
2) connect one habit to one you already do, and do both. For example, if you are already brushing your teeth in the evening, then also brush your hair
3) do the same thing at the same time each day - this will create a routine that will become automatic and less likely to get ditched
4) find some time (even 5 minutes a day) to sit in nature or open the windows and get fresh air
5) put some music on and dance your way through it. You won't be able to resist a change in mood listening to songs like Sledge Hammer (Peter Gabriel) or Unstoppable by Sia!
By the way, speaking up for yourself or letting other people know what you are not ok with, is also a form of self-care. Anything that helps you look after yourself, recharge and give you energy can count, too.
What do you think? Which of these resonates?
This week in Healing Conversations I was talking with the lovely Dr. Tovah Goldfine about 'Healing Unexplained Medical Conditions'
About the chat:
This episode features an enlightening conversation between host Einav Avni and guest Dr. Tovah Goldfine, a chiropractor with a spiritual approach to healing. Dr. Goldfine shares her profound insights into the mind-body connection, emphasising the body's innate ability to heal.
Together, they delve into the impact of diagnoses on people's lives, the importance of integrating psychological components in medical treatments, and the powerful tools of journaling, expressive writing, mindfulness, and meditation for emotional processing and healing. Join us as we uncover the transformative potential of understanding and addressing emotions to aid healing.
More about Dr. Tovah:
For the past 38 years, Dr.Tovah has been a Specialist in Mind-Body healing methods, for chronic pain and autoimmune diseases using scientific methods of neuroplasticity.
She is also a Doctor of Chiropractic and Rehabilitation.
In 2019, she created two weekly broadcasts on Facebook and YouTube, TMS RoundTable Global and TMS RoundTable Israel, where she meets with doctors, therapists, health professionals, and authors to educate and inspire about healing chronic pain and autoimmune diseases. Also on the weekly broadcast, Dr. Tovah shares with individuals who have self-healed using the Mind Body methods; healing from cancer, autoimmune conditions chronic pain and medically unexplained symptoms (MUS).
She treats local clients in Israel and internationally through remote work via Teletherapy.
Social Links:
1) www.drtovah.com
3) https://www.youtube.com/channe...
4) https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr...
5) https://www.facebook.com/Tovah...
6) https://www.facebook.com/TMSRo...
(click the images to be directed to the episode)
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Have you ever noticed how every time you want to do something you haven't done before, a voice comes up in your mind telling you you shouldn't do it because you'll fail, or that you're not good enough or that your ideas suck, they've always sucked and in fact, this is what brought you to the exact place where you are right now in life?
Well, let me introduce you to your negative self-talk, and you might find solace knowing nearly all of us have it!
This negative voice started as a cute little puppy that helped you make sense of life when you were too tiny to know any different. Now, all these years later, the voice is still trying to protect you, only it does so by telling you LIES about what will happen if you don't listen to it...
This online course is for you if you're tired of this little voice running your life and stopping you from doing and achieving the life you know is yours!
Register now - for a course you can complete in a day - for a lifetime of change!
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I've worked with countless people to heal, gain confidence and live an aligned and empowered life. If you'd like to find out more about working together then please book a chat using the link below
https://calendly.com/einav-4/coaching-discovery-call
Wishing you all a beautiful week ahead,
einav x